A cleaning product I love? Am I coming down with something?

Yes, I must be feverish. Hallucinating. Delerious. Because I've found a cleaning product I actually love! (Yes, me!) It's the Swiffer Wet Jet! Why do I love it? Let me count the ways! The Swiffer Wet Jet makes it possible to have a clean floor without either (a) scrubbing on hands & knees, or (b) lugging around a big, nasty bucket of water. Instead, I just sweep and swiffer!

I don't even need to bend over to squeegee out the sponge mop! Instead of a sponge, Swiffer WetJet uses a nifty little maxi-pad that just velcroes onto its wiping surface. The squirter is cool, too! It is battery operated, you just push a button to spray the cleaning solution onto the floor.

Cousin It, doggy-style

How is it possible that Sunny can shed so much and still possess a luxuriously full, shiny coat? I am currently sweeping the floor every day--and each time, I get a dog-hair tumbleweed the size of a bowling ball. It's a wonder she's not completely bald.

Between official sweeps, I scoop up small, bonus tumbleweeds that lurk in corners, at the base of chairs, behind the refrigerator. I'm convinced that there are small tufts of fur gathering stealthily throughout the house. They watch me, waiting for me to sit down, then they scurry out of hiding while my back is turned.

It's a conspiracy. Together, the hairballs plan to takeover the kitchen, the family room and then the world! Meanwhile, I'm plotting against them, determined to sweep them into oblivion--at least until I can figure out how to transform a giant hairball into a living, breathing dachshund puppy.